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The Pulp Faction • View topic - Maggie McFee - Jill Tomorrow - NSW/MA

Maggie McFee - Jill Tomorrow - NSW/MA

Forum for the 2005 OzComics 24 Hour Challenge. (ARCHIVED - READ ONLY)

Postby maggie on Tue Jun 14, 2005 2:33 pm

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Postby XiaoLi on Tue Jun 14, 2005 3:47 pm

Bah, parents :D
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Postby Gary Lau on Tue Jun 14, 2005 4:11 pm

Hey Maggie, you did a very cool story here, I liked it! I also liked that line "Kiss me, you fool!" got a smile outta me! :)

Not sure about that ending though, but I guess you had to end it somehow and could leave you open for other adventures with Jill Tomorrow when she dreams again. :)
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Postby gavin on Tue Jun 14, 2005 4:35 pm

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Postby Pirotess on Tue Jun 14, 2005 8:38 pm

Komala Singh

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Postby Li'l Sketchy on Tue Jun 14, 2005 9:09 pm

Ha ha! 'Kiss me you leather clad fool'. As if there was any other kind...

And I like the dream thing. Teachers and parents are forever telling us that 'TV rots your brain!' ... Well obviously it doesn't! Der!!! Strike one up in the 'TV is good' column.

Good stuff Maggie. I know quality declines as the time goes on, I suffer from it too, but the first few pages were the best. Cute girl...
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Postby Egofreaky on Tue Jun 14, 2005 11:18 pm

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Postby practicecactus on Wed Jun 15, 2005 12:49 am

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Postby maggie on Wed Jun 15, 2005 4:46 am

hehe
The entire thing is allegory and metaphor. :) (well, such as it was)

Sorry to those of you disappointed with the daydream aspect, but I set out to do this from the start so... it wasn't just me trying to wrap it up. Oh well. *shrug*

Alternate endings were:
Jill is asleep (not just dyadreaming) and calling Tegan's name. Mother wakes her up and says something along the lines of "you really do love her, don't you... maybe we were to hard on you..."

Jill comes to and is deflated to realize she was dreaming. Girlfriend has still left her and parents are still dicks.
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Postby Kenny on Wed Jun 15, 2005 3:10 pm

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Postby xaverlex on Sat Jun 18, 2005 7:11 pm

sorry I'm late, this elephant totally copped a 'tude with me.
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Postby maggie on Sun Jun 19, 2005 4:36 am

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Postby Owen Heitmann on Tue Jun 21, 2005 6:46 pm

As I was reading it, Jill's blind faith that Tegan must have been brainwashed to act so cold seemed laughable to me (I am a complete cynic). So the revelation that Tegan had actually been kidnapped seemed like naive writing. But in retrospect, the ending makes it all fit together perfectly; the daydream being Jill's self-delusional response to harsh reality, making the fluffy tone of the story work rather well. Bravo!

I also enjoyed the futuristic city scape and the robot guard.
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Postby maggie on Wed Jun 22, 2005 2:30 am

Thanks, Owen. :)
I had some more crushing or harsh endings to choose from, but I just felt the more whimsical ending was the safer bet. heh
Young breakups are so dramatic and I can recall spending hours wondering 'why' and thinking up all kinds of reasons (other than 'she doesn't want me', of course hehe). Tack on the added burden of being gay (and the associated parental issues that brings)... and that's what I had in mind.
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