Guilt.

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Guilt.

Postby Fah on Fri May 23, 2008 6:53 am

Does anybody else feel guilty when they haven't written/drawn or otherwise created something every day?
If you're in the industry then you probably don't have time to feel guilty. But there must be lean times when you don't get work. Do you feel guilty then...? You know almost like you have to justify the course you've taken by at least accomplishing something. Or are you just glad to get a breather. And for those of you for whom creation feels more a compulsion than a choice do you ever feel that it justifies your existence...? (And now I'm talking about deep insecurity.)

Is it the same for artists and writers? I mean as a would-be writer I have to have product. But as an artist you can just work on other people's ideas. What do you do when you can't find a project you like? Make your own?
Do you ever get 'artist's block.' ? Is there even such a thing...? And what happens when you do?

I'm sorry if this sounds more like an interrogation than a friendly inquiry but I just have to know. And the second paragraph probably belongs on a different section of the forum. But anyway...
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Re: Guilt.

Postby Azzamckazza on Fri May 23, 2008 4:09 pm

i live with a constant guilty feeling that i'm not doing enough for my art. Even now, while I'm at uni, where I am working on my art most of the time, I still have that feeling.

I'm a very, very lazy artist. I wish some time in my youth I'd been instilled with a good work ethic. I'm only now getting myself into gear. Learning to enjoy the process.

But stilll.....Even when i've had a big day and all I want to do is watch tv the voice in my head still whispers... "You should be more....."
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Re: Guilt.

Postby Fah on Sat May 24, 2008 6:49 am

I'm getting to be like that myself. It makes it hard to enjoy television. Though I'm still not sure if it's necessarily a bad thing. Then again it must be important to be able to relax.
I came to writing belatedly and until I did I felt very unfulfilled. I've had lot's of jobs because of that. I worked hard because I believed that that's what it took to be happy. I thought happiness was something you psyched yourself up for in the morning. And it does work. But it's silly and ultimately unsustainable. So now that I've got writing in my life I wake up happy. But because I'm new to it I'm also insecure. I sometimes fear that it will somehow go away. Or rather the sense of fulfillment will evaporate and I'll be back where I started. This for me is one of the reasons I feel guilty when I'm not working at it on some level (eg editing at least if not inventing.) It's as though I fear if I don't appreciate it it will be taken away.

Art and writing are insular pursuits. They're obsessions. Once you really get into something you think about it all the time. And I can only imagine how much more anxiety it creates when you're actually paid to perform. I'm only just coming to realise these things.

I still waste time. Like daydreaming. Even when someone's talking to me. It's really rude. Anyway maybe you need to 'waste' time too if you're going to have good ideas. I mean it all starts with a dream, but you need time to dream don't you...? You need to give yourself or your subconscious (or whatever it is) time to digest what you've consciously and unconsciously consumed and hopefully regurgitate something useful later on.

Thanks for the reply. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who feels this way.

And it just occurred to me on reflection (and maybe I'm just being overly self-conscious here) but some of my questions might be interpreted as an attempt to lure you into a discussion where I can then foist a statement upon you like 'Oh and I've got this great idea that you've just gotta take a look at!'
This is not the case. I know my questioning is haphazard and sometimes irrelevant but it's sincere. I sit down with one question in mind but a dozen more then occur.
I do just enjoy a chat as it is a way to combat the isolation while I pursue my goals.
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Re: Guilt.

Postby Voltarrens on Fri May 30, 2008 3:39 pm

Yes, guilty as charged :p

Even though I'm working practically alone on a very long and time consuming project of my own with no deadlines http://forums.pulpfaction.net/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=2792 . . . at times I feel very guilty that I haven't done enough in a week, that some of my time has been wasted by distractions that I shouldn't have become involved with . . . . need to focus more sometimes.

Sometimes it's just frustrating working with some of the 3D programs when they have a bad bug or I'm trying to learn something and the tutorials are useless and I have to find my own way with trial and error. (I'm learning a lot though out of the process, maybe too much :roll: ) Having picked such a slow process to work with, I find that time becomes my most precious resource and I really do feel guilty when I have a day or two of not having done anything.
"Drama is life with the dull bits cut out" -- Alfred Hitchcock.
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Re: Guilt.

Postby apple head on Sun Aug 03, 2008 6:51 am

I feel stupid not putting in enough work sometimes, but not guilty.
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Re: Guilt.

Postby Maleficus on Fri Aug 22, 2008 8:43 pm

Since I only really write when inspiration hits, I feel no guilt for not doing anything. I write when I can't do anything but write, I write when I have ideas, I write when I have nothing else to do. I still only write as a hobby, so I guess it's different for me, but I write for my own enjoyment, not to develop my talents or create work to get published. I write for myself, so if I'm not going to think that someone else is waiting for me to produce anything or will be disappointed if I don't improve.
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Re: Guilt.

Postby AndreiB on Tue Oct 05, 2010 12:55 pm

I feel guilty regarding amount of art produced but I think that's a good thing - something to stave off long periods of being artistically neutered or being happy watching trash TV or playing repetitive videogames. I tie my guilt to self-imposed deadlines, I think if I didn't have those I wouldn't have half as much guilt as I do.
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